I destroyed my boyfriend

Treated me pretty baldy as she was dating both of us until she decided to go with her lover.

I DESTROYED my Boyfriends Pokemon card WORTH $7000

I have a job, friends, family and I go out on dates every now and then, but these sadness doesnt go away. Listen, everybody processes pain differently. My ex and I broke up over 2 years ago and I can tell you that about once every 10 days or so I still have the same horrible nightmares in which I wake up crying my eyes out, or screaming. Thats why I'm up at the crack of dawn right now. Finding a new girl you say? If it were that easy.

i destroyed my boyfriend

I've been on dates with around 12 different women since she left. I've even been intimate with some of those girls, but there hasn't been any connection with them.

i destroyed my boyfriend

I had panic attacks just a week or so after my break up From the way you sound it was on your post, that was on her part. Forgiving her may be your only chance to "get over it". Realizing she is the one to blame can be the hardest thing. My first GF and i were together 3 years and she just decided we were too serious and lost her feelingd for me. Blamed myself for two weeks, but now i know that nothing i could have done could have changed it. I think. I know how you feel because my broke up 2 months back and got into a relationship in just 15 days.

I too feel he was already having something with his current gf. The emotions are always random and majorly negative Counselling is a very good advice. And don't pay heed to whatever the others our saying. Only you know your pain. Reach out to someone who can support you in the effort of the counselling.After a mountain of pressure from the people I loved, I finally mustered up the courage to call my ex. My best friend was squeezing my hand so hard, I thought it would crack.

I'm so proud of you. Now, your life can start! And I wasn't even alone with myself because I had lost myself. She stored my confidence somewhere far, far away, and I didn't know how to get to it. And I got it back. It was real work, but I got over the person who destroyed me from the inside out. I don't care how much money you have or you don't have, you need to get yourself in therapy right now.

I used to think therapy was only for rich, neurotic, Manhattan natives, but trust me, that's not true! I went years without a dentist, let alone a therapist. There are so many mental health resources out there that are either free or affordable. But, my sweet kitten, we need to get you into therapy so you can figure out why you let yourself fall in love with someone who treats you this way.

Because something drew you to this toxic relationship, and until you get to the root of it, you'll never break the cycle.

i destroyed my boyfriend

You'll keep falling for energy vampires who suck the life right out of you. Do you have that one friend who always greets you with a bitchy comment that leaves you feeling like an insecure teenager? Do you have that friend who only calls you to score drugs or to sit at your table when you have bottle service?

I don't care if you've known these people since first grade. I don't care if you share the same blood. Friends and family are in our lives to make us feel better, not worse! In this particularly vulnerable time, you can't risk letting negativity in.

Surround yourself with the people who make you feel happy. Maybe it's that one girl who sits next to at work. Now is a time to invest in positive energy. Close your eyes, and remember your life before this relationship. You had hobbies before this person swooped in and sucked the air out of you.

Whatever it is you liked to do, immerse yourself in it now! When you do something you love — something entirely independent of others — you will begin to feel human again. And that empowering feeling will propel you out of the dirty soil of heartbreak and bring you back to the LIGHT, girl.

Chances are, when you were with your shitty ex who destroyed your self-esteem, you stopped dressing like yourself, huh? Maybe you watered your style down to blend in with theirs. Well, I'm here to tell you that you are interesting and exotic, and you don't have to appease your shitty ex anymore. Go blonde. Go raven.

Start wearing ripped jeans and sequin shoes!

I was the toxic one in my relationship, and ruined everything

Animal prints! Just don't you dare hold back! When you start to dress like yourself, you'll find yourself again. Fashion, beauty and style are outer expressions of how we feel inside.I think I have ruined everything. It hurts so much I can't breathe. I feel sick and I can't stop crying. I've done so many stupid things in the past few months that I may have destroyed my relationship permanently.

I have never been so devastated, I really didn't know how I could survive that kind of pain, and I felt like I was dying inside. That was 10 months ago.

After 6 weeks apart, during which I suffered complete agony, some things went wrong in his life, his car broke down and he couldn't get it fixed so had no way to work and no money to do it with. He called me to help him and I was really upset, because my mom was dying and he hadn't been calling to check on me or her.

Ask Lisa: I Ruined my Relationship out of Fear

He only called when he needed help. I was so incredibly heartbroken. I had been crying every day for the past sixi weeks, and I was also angry and wasn't sure I wanted to help him but I did and he wrote me a letter telling me how very sorry he was, how wrong he had been, how much he loved me and would do anything to make it all up to me.

We got back together, but I had huge problems with trusting him after that, or believing he really loved me. I was afraid he was back with me because he couldn't make it on his own financially and that if he had money in the bank he wouldn't have ever wanted me back in his life. Despite what he said about changing everything, he still didn't contribute anything toward rent and spent all of his paychecks on things for himself and his car.

Then he began to get some texts from a girl he worked with, one he told me had a crush on him. He never bought anything for me, and I mean even little things like a cup of coffee or fast food when he bought some for himself but he was buying books on how to meet people, how to get anyone to like you within 5 minutes etc.

This really bothered me because while we were broken up he bought books on how to be a pick-up artist and how to seduce women even if they were married etc.

We went to a music festival and I got upset and insecure because he barely looked at me while we there and I felt like he was looking at every other woman we passed by. I said something to him about how it didn't feel very nice when he did that and he got enraged at me.

He didn't want to talk to me on the ride home, barely is speaking to me now, and I know that one of his coworkers who he spends a lot of time with has been suggesting he could fix my boyfriend up with other women. My boyfriend stayed late to work, has been getting phone calls from weird numbers and isn't answering my texts like he used to.

I agree with what guy had replied on the old thread that Things started to gone bad from when he wanted to be "out from the relationship".Wednesday chat at 1. I am going through the most severe heartbreak of my life.

My ex-boyfriend and I were together about a year and a half when he decided that he wanted to break up. I am responsible for the demise of our relationship. There was no cheating or lying involved. At that time I was going through some major problems at work and was overly stressed, and I did not communicate how stressed I was.

I guess I needed a punching bag, so I took it out on him. I started fights and put him down, saying that everything he was doing did not meet my standards. I stopped appreciating him and took him for granted and became needy.

Basically, I did everything that you are not supposed to do. I feel horrible and it tears my heart apart, the way I acted towards him. A day does not pass by that I do not think of him and grieve our relationship.

My behavior started only two months prior to breaking up. We had an amazing relationship prior to that, as he would say, "I was the love of his life. I have apologized to him and received a kind email just stating that we have to move on. We have not communicated for about four months. I am still in love with him; he was the ONE. I would love to have him back in my life but I do not know how that is possible.

After the breakup, I never called him or begged him to take me back. How do I go about trying to reach out to him again? I love him very much. I assume that when you apologized, you told him that you missed him. I also assume that at some point during the breakup, you tried to explain your behavior and promised to change your ways.

If that's the case and you've already communicated that you want another chance, you have to accept that he's gone. You don't have to beg. There is no "ONE. You claim that the relationship unraveled in just two months, but isn't it possible that there were problems before the end? You were unhappy. You dealt with that by criticizing the relationship. And rather than saying, "What is going on here?

It seems to me that things might not have been perfect before those last eight weeks. If you failed to communicate your desire to stay together, there's no harm in telling him via email, please that you've tried therapy and fear that you've both lost too much by walking away.

But honestly, it sounds like he knows what you want. Please spend some time considering the possibility that you've romanticized the first 16 months with this guy. Wonderful relationships don't fall apart after a bad eight weeks.

There's usually more to it.This guy is trouble. I gather you are USA so judge judy is probably a good bet. He sounds like a real nice guy. Dump him if you haven't already A couple weeks ago my boyfriend and I got into a fight. He cut up my clothes and took off in my car.

He purposely crashed into a trashcan and as a result the drivers side door hardly opens and the outside mirror is missing. He told me if I didn't call the cops he'd buy me new clothes and fix the damages on my car. The day after he bought himself anew pair of shoes and a shirt.

Which made me very upset because my clothes are ruined. So since then he hasn't done anything to make up for it just spend his money on weed. This morning I was upset and wanted to talk so he got mad and called me a bitch and put my car into park while I was driving which probably messed up my transmission.

He threatened if im not home after work he will come find me.

I ruined our great relationship

What do I do? Im scared he knows where my mom and friends live. Share Facebook. My boyfriend ruined my car and cut up my clothes can I get him in trouble? Add Opinion. FatherKnowsBest Xper 6. First, how can you classify such a person as a 'boyfriend'?

Friends don't do destructive things to their mates. Secondly, yes you should file a police report. Write everything down on paper to make sure you have the facts in order.

Also get in contact with The Legal Aid Society. This is a professional organization established to provide free pro bono legal aid for those who cannot afford a lawyer. They will give you a real lawyer to provide professional and accurate advice on what you can do.

Lastly, do not see this man again. Break it off NOW! He obviously has no intention of paying you back. You deserve to be treated with respect, no excuses. The next time it may be YOU he hurts. Let's not let that happen. So act now! Johnson Xper 7. This guy seems like a pathetic ass sorry to say.

He seems like a bum, why would someone even go to that length to do just things. If he kept doing that to your transmission while driving the car then yeah that is bad and it cost a lot to fix, it is a newer car if i may ask? He seems like a low life, call the police right now and don't be scared of telling them, he will get in trouble.

It is a My boyfriend and I recently broke up. When we first started off as friends I kept pushing him to other girls until he thought he had no chance with me whatsoever and pushed his feelings for me and really thought of me as just a friend. And he was resolved that we would just be friends.

Until I told him how I felt about him. At first he fought me and said that all he could see of me was friendship, but as time went on, the feelings he hid came out and he gave me his heart. Well idiot that I was I kept fighting him again, mostly this time of jealousy. Days later I wrote him a letter trying to get him back and start again. I convinced him somehow and he agreed so we started out slow and days later we were back to what we were again.

This time when we broke up I took longer to contact him. I egged him on to end things because he was confused on his feeling for me and it just made me resent him. I feel so remorseful. I realized I ruined the best relationship I ever had because of fear.

I was like? And I realized he did it again, his mind compartmentalized and placed me in the friendship file. His mind is so quick to go into a survival mode. I asked him if we could start off as friends, and dating no one for 2 months.

Even though from my experience it took about less than a week for his subconscious to remember his feelings for me, what can I do to help him remember and get back his feelings for me. I have only two months. And why do guys do this? How can they compartmentalize that easily? Please help me what can I do to help him remember and get back his feelings for me? The best way to create emotional safety is to have an atmosphere of open communication, understanding, validation, empathy and respect for each other.

It sounds like you two have a great foundation with such a good friendship! But — you have a great deal of distance between you. This will likely prove challenging but not impossible. Work really hard at keeping your heart open, noticing the fear that comes up for you and sit with that feeling.

Perhaps he has been so hurt by you that he is holding back — which would be understandable right? Create a safe haven for him to come out from hiding. Need advice? She is a frequent consultant for the media having appeared in CNN. You must be logged in to post a comment. Relationships Relationships Etc. View all posts.

Add comment.I said yes, because I felt I had to. But I can't go through with it. Photo: iStock Source:Whimn. My boyfriend Michael and I were running late when we arrived at the cinema. It was one of those little arthouse places that only seats about 50 people — miraculously, there were only two seats left but they were right in the centre — the best seats in the house.

Michael and I had almost had a big fight before even getting to the cinema. What I wanted was wine. What I got was a nightmare. Image: iStock. But Michael insisted. The lights were low when we walked in and I could hardly see, but we made our way to our seats as the ads were finishing.

It was then that the whole circus began. The minute I saw his face up on the big screen, I knew what was happening, and I felt myself break into a cold sweat. If the film had been for someone else, I would have thought it was lovely, but I was irritated.

I could see Michael had gone to a lot of trouble, but I felt put on the spot. Michael had been holding my hand the entire time, and I could feel the sweat of my palms making the whole scene clammy and awkward.

He squeezed my hand without looking at me and got up, walking to the stage in front of the screen. Then the house lights came up and I suddenly saw the whole cinema was full of our family and friends. How had I not noticed before that I was sitting next to my own sister?

I felt like I could hear my heart beating in my ears as Michael thanked everyone there for coming, and got down on one knee to ask me to marry him. And then I was under a literal spotlight, with everyone there silently smiling at me, expectant and thrilled. He climbed up on stage and popped the question.

I felt sick. The crowd of our favourite people applauded and rushed up to congratulate us. I had a smile plastered on my face but inside I was seething. I always thought a proposal should be meaningful and from the heart, and this felt like a sideshow. Like it was done for the applause rather than for love. I also felt railroaded. What if I needed time to think? Now it feels like our engagement is based on a lie.

i destroyed my boyfriend

Michael is so proud of himself and his efforts, and I can see why he would be.


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